Death to TIGHTS as PANTS. It has been a long time coming. The footless leggings revival, the lace cuffed tights, American Apparel outfitting all young women in leggings under micros, equestrian pants, yoga spandex sported as jeans. Vancouver has been lapping up the lazy wardrobe of T as P for quite some time now, but I finally feel compelled to scream “ENOUGH!” We have gone from short dresses and pretty tunics paired with leggings, which I can abide, to full-fledged too much information. Instead of opaque knit leggings or faux jeans, we have women of all ages, shapes and sizes shimmying into nylons as pants. Semi-opaque tights that are often filmy in the thigh and bum, and sheer hose with shirts that don’t even reach the hip bones. Hollywood party girl at her most disheveled. In one morning commute I know the thong style, garter girth and shadowed crackage (and that other unmentionable side effect) of more women than I ever thought possible.
Most women can effortlessly pull off leggings as pants (emphasis on leggings made of fabric more opaque than 40 denier) if they understand the general rules, i.e. that they do not replace pants purely because you pull them on in the same manner. Solo sheer pantyhose can’t replace your skirt, your dreadful formal shorts, or your over-sized shirt. It is an accoutrement! Pair T as P with the trend for cropped leather jackets and you have a recipe for disaster. Any gal with a little common sense will whisper “Heavens, that girl forgot her skirt!” when you walk by – you leave nothing to the imagination and if you were to get a run in the back like three girls I saw in the past week, game over. A little modesty is a hell of a lot sexier. Bring it back girls, bring back the air of mystery. Leave the scary T as P to the likes of Juliette Lewis, we can’t all be bad-ass rock stars.
I know the pants-less revolution is taking place all over the world, but by golly I think the Vancouverite ladies may have interpreted the trend a little too transparently. For the cheeky promoters of death to T as P, check out Tights Are Not Pants for helpful DIY propaganda kits. Maybe they will help convince your friends averse to leaving the house fully dressed to return from the dark side.